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Orthodox Priest of All Russia
“… Once I was embodied at the time of the first Christians. I was not a direct disciple of Jesus and did not see Him. But the wave of Jesus, which roused humanity at that time, touched Me as well… I, like many others, was killed by Romans in the state of unshakable faith in Jesus, believing that He would receive Me… And I attained the paradisiacal state then.
“After that I was embodied several times, developing missing qualities of the soul, multiplying love, wisdom, and power in Myself.
“In Russia I was embodied from an almost Divine state with the task of bringing Christ’s Love to the hearts of people. I was an Orthodox priest. I studied very carefully the traditions of ‘pre-Christian’ Russia, which remained in small centers in the woods. They were considered ‘pagan’ and were destroyed…
“I tried to save what remained in them, managed to understand a lot and, thanks to this, to attain Mergence with the Father. But I could not unite for people the best things in these two diverging currents… I did not manage to change the history of spirituality in Russia…”
“Tell us, please, a bit more about Yourself…”
“Well…
“I received a spiritual education in Moscow. It was the time after the reform of patriarch Nikon, when passions had not faded yet. The ideas of the reformation of the Orthodox Church were still in the minds, both in good and bad ones.
“I was filled with the desire to reorganize the life of the Church according to the commandments of Jesus Christ. My heart and mind were burning with ideas of transformation of the spiritual life.
“Because My passionate speeches excited the minds, I was sent to a remote parish after completing education.
“I considered this as an exile…
“… Foothills of the Ural Mountains, backwoods…
“A small dilapidated church, which looked like a hermitage, stood solitary in the forest, far away even from villages which belonged to its parish.
“When I was sent there, I heard gloating whispers behind My back:
‘He will learn now to be humble and silent! There will be no one to speak with in that place!… There is an old monk-prior, one of those troublesome non-possessors. He has taken a vow of silence and does not say a word in the whole year…’
“When I came to that place, I felt grief and sorrow. Does anyone here need Me? What is My purpose here?… The old monk-prior had been living here for forty years. And what? Is it My fate too? One can go insane because of this…
“… But the eyes of that monk were full of amazing warmth and tenderness…
’How have you lived here alone, father, for so many years?!’ I asked.
’Why alone? I live with the Lord Jesus…’ the old monk Nikolay smiled in response…
“… And he began teaching Me hesychia — inner quietness.
“I learned to experience Jesus in My heart.
“Before I had lived in love, but now I learned to submerge My deep passion into the depths of calm and silence…
“Now the cordial light filled everything in our life.
“… But the old man Nikolay died soon. He left quietly as if he fell asleep and woke up in the paradisiacal abode of souls…
“… I started to revive the spiritual life of people living in the villages around and helped them how I could…
“… Once I tried to save the life of a child who was seriously ill. I did not have deep medical knowledge. The boy had a fever and stertorous breathing. I did with My hands what I could to help him and prayed to Jesus in My heart to heal this body. In some moments, it seemed to Me that the life of the child’s body was supported by the power of My hands…, but a recovery ‘thanks to a prayer’ did not happen…
“Almost a day and a night had gone by when a woman of amazing beauty entered the hut… Thick white hair, serene blue-gray eyes… She stood motionless for several seconds in a doorway, having seen Me, dressed in black monastic clothes, on My knees before the bed of the child… Then She resolved, entered, bowed down to the ground to all, and said quietly:
’Go home, father. I will heal the boy!’
“I was on My last legs. I went out of the room and began praying, but fell into the pure and bright Light… There was only Light… I did not know at that moment that it was the Light of Her Consciousness… I thought that I fell asleep and dreamed…
“When I awakened, the child was almost recovered and was sleeping quietly. The woman had gone…
“Who was She? From where? No one knew…
“… Once, when I went too far in the forest, a kind of bag fell over My head, and I was bound and brought somewhere… I thought it was robbers and, having called Jesus in My heart, fell to My knees and prepared to die.
“But I heard words over Me:
‘He does not intend to do anything bad. Unbind him.’
“When they took off the bag from My head, I saw an old tall gray-haired man and many people — old and young, men and women… Among them there was the woman Who healed the boy. Her name was Rada…
“In that way, thanks to the Will of God, I found Myself in one of the communities which saved the knowledge and traditions of ancient Russia… The old tall man who ordered to release Me was a clairvoyant and a leader of these people. Rada was his granddaughter.
“Being pursued by a new wave of the inquisition, started at that time against the Old Believers as well as against all non-Orthodox, people of this small community went away from the persecution farther and farther into the forests… They planned to spend winter in that region, and then to go in spring beyond the Ural Mountains, farther to the Siberian woods.
“… I told them about Jesus, about what He taught. They listened, agreed with everything, but refused My proposals to adopt Christianity officially…
“… I also began learning the spiritual knowledge of ancient Russia. I realized that Jesus taught His closest disciples the same, just described this in other words! It is this that I missed in My previous spiritual quest!…
“Rada had time to teach Me healing and exercises of meditation — special methods for development of the consciousness. She said with sadness that now most of Her relatives thought more about how to survive rather than how to cognize the Father-Svarog…
“She rejoiced greatly at My progress…
“To learn at that forest ‘temple’ was so joyful and easy for Me! As if the soul was released from a cage and flew, expanded in silent delight — together with the light of the rising sun — over the expanse of the earth: over a river, over a distant forest… Like in a forest lake, the soul submerged into the Light of the Earth and dissolved in the bliss of being Light…
“In that way I learned to be a soul-Light which is free from the corporeal flesh…
“I mastered everything easily: the consciousness crystallized in the previous lives and hesychia mastered thanks to the old man Nikolay, helped the heart, aspiring in love to the Lord, to Mergence with Him…
“… But My education with Rada did not last long…
“I had time to warn in advance My new friends about the approaching of inquisitors who wanted to burn them at the stake…
“They left in late autumn…
“… I began writing a book where I tried to unite the true Christianity with the knowledge about development of the soul and cognition of God which I received from Rada.
“… The more I worked the more Jesus helped Me. I received from Him more and more new meditative techniques for self-development. Jesus led Me, and I submerged deeper into Mergence with the Father.
“… At last, the book was finished… I described in it My ideas about transformation of the Church and codes of ethical precepts for the laity and priesthood…
“At that time, the tsar started some reforms in the political structure of the society. I saw that it was a chance to change the course of the development of Orthodoxy in Russia…
“I came to the capital. The tsar received Me and listened to Me. But He did not like My words about spirituality of ‘new Russia’: he dreamed about other glory of the country!… He gave My book for consideration of the higher clergy…
“… They did not even torture Me. My work scared them so much that I was executed right away in order that none of My thoughts could leak out of a torture chamber. All My records were burnt…
“… I accepted death easily. Jesus was with Me.
“And I became One with the Father!”
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